Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
