Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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