Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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