how can u be prego again
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
im holly from the hills drunk
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
