Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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