shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
