Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
