I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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