you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
