How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
