all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Randomize
