I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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