More tranny stories later!
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
True strength comes from lack of pants
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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