he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
