his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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