spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
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