bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
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