ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…