I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do