therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
