I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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