I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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