a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize