would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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