Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
