apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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