we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
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