New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
