and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
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