I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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