Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops

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(718): View more from New York

Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!

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(416): View more from Toronto

He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.

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(351): View more from Massachusetts

the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.

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(313): View more from Michigan

he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.

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(757): View more from Virginia

So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??

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