can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize