I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
