Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
