Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...

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  (734): Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception... http://tfl.nu/2wqa
  Replies (2) Good night (1716) Bad night (2089)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.

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  (330): I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome. http://tfl.nu/21pe
  Replies (22) Good night (29294) Bad night (1234)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.

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  (719): Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear. http://tfl.nu/pswl
  Replies (8) Good night (960) Bad night (3013)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.

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  (910): We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works. http://tfl.nu/uib3
  Replies (45) Good night (5859) Bad night (1313)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?

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  (913): What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase? http://tfl.nu/cv8y
  Replies (9) Good night (2515) Bad night (1483)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating

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  (603): He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating http://tfl.nu/fvws
  Replies (10) Good night (3406) Bad night (1018)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend

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  (403): Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend http://tfl.nu/6ul7
  Replies (5) Good night (3851) Bad night (1016)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.

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  (715): tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder. http://tfl.nu/8ixi
  Replies (6) Good night (919) Bad night (1349)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.

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  (802): I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place. http://tfl.nu/5u6t
  Replies (2) Good night (1079) Bad night (578)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.

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  (757): Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today. http://tfl.nu/c0a7
  Replies (7) Good night (693) Bad night (1688)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.

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  (574): My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever. http://tfl.nu/qus4
  Replies (1) Good night (1223) Bad night (581)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.

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  (863): I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life. http://tfl.nu/jtja
  Replies (8) Good night (2750) Bad night (583)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed

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  (660): He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed http://tfl.nu/yvvk
  Replies (8) Good night (1232) Bad night (617)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.

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  (317): Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions. http://tfl.nu/72j5
  Replies (2) Good night (719) Bad night (280)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.

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  (801): Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight. http://tfl.nu/r4nr
  Replies (5) Good night (290) Bad night (666)

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