Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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