You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Randomize
