Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize