I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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