I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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