White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
