Texts From Last Night

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  (941): View more from Florida

  I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie

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  (941): I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie http://tfl.nu/ovq9
  Replies (16) Good night (1011) Bad night (1516)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body

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  (814): I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body http://tfl.nu/xxkq
  Replies (5) Good night (851) Bad night (3104)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona

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  (404): your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona http://tfl.nu/j0d8
  Replies (24) Good night (813) Bad night (3394)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song

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  (847): i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song http://tfl.nu/7299
  Replies (48) Good night (1369) Bad night (5053)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I

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  (516): Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I<3 NY. http://tfl.nu/f30c
  Replies (54) Good night (5133) Bad night (597)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.

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  (814): an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high. http://tfl.nu/ivcn
  Replies (16) Good night (4715) Bad night (948)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...

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  (270): The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips... http://tfl.nu/unl6
  Replies (8) Good night (5527) Bad night (1680)
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  (530): View more from California

  And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?

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  (530): And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion? http://tfl.nu/zsah
  Replies (6) Good night (2004) Bad night (1102)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..

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  (414): She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits.. http://tfl.nu/lntf
  Replies (4) Good night (928) Bad night (1641)
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  (310): View more from California

  It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots

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  (310): It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots http://tfl.nu/44j2
  Replies (4) Good night (731) Bad night (1675)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question

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  (570): I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me (1-570): How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question http://tfl.nu/l5jk
  Replies (11) Good night (1003) Bad night (1716)
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  (714): View more from California

  The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!

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  (714): The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to! http://tfl.nu/8lua
  Replies (14) Good night (1921) Bad night (664)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk

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  (760): I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk http://tfl.nu/6zmb
  Replies (4) Good night (508) Bad night (1045)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.

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  (509): i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot. http://tfl.nu/0579
  Replies (3) Good night (1132) Bad night (433)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.

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  (937): I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face. http://tfl.nu/lqby
  Replies (4) Good night (544) Bad night (222)

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