Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
