Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
