But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
