5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
