When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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