did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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