just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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