I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize