It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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