thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Randomize
