you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
